Life has become chaos and mayhem, but yet, i find myself sitting back and hoping it will pass by me. Each day i hope for it to go by fast so that i can enjoy my evening. Yet each evening is just a waist of time as it is at school, yet school may have all my friends there, i feel more comfortable at home cause of my procrastinating nature is preventing me from doing work. I see my friends around me each day, each one in the same state, some in a more stressful state, because of trying to get into college. I chose to take an easier road by going to the junior college, does that make me a wiser person or a dumber person for having done so, or does that just make me an underacheiver. No matter what it may be, I see each day passing by, i realize these last few months, i may see some of these people for the rest of my life, or i may never see them again, and that makes me really sad. those that i grew up with in my childhood all wanna leave and go far away. I just hope that i get to remain in contact with these people. I find myself at a new turn everyday, and i take that turn, i hope im taking the right one, but its just so untrusting rather or not if i did or not. I wish sometimes i could wave a magic wand and all thigns be the way i want it, or i could go back in time and make up for either the lost time i didnt make up, or fix mistakes with people so that i could maybe have a better happier life then i do now. I put on a face everyday, and for who, certainly not for myself, if it is for myself its only to hide what im truly feeling deep inside. I dont know if i will ever be able to remove my mask, if i do it will take alot of time, and alot of good things happening all at once. Until then, all there is left to do, is to take each day at a time, and put all my faith in the Lord and hopefully he will guide me to the right path and i will be able to find my own happiness.